perhaps, i am meant to be alone. no relationship. no friends. sometimes, when people get too close to me, i push them away. not because i hate them, but because i am afraid of getting hurt, disappointed, or left behind. i have been through so much that keeping my distance feels safer than letting someone in. and after a while, i start to wonder if i am the reason people leave. maybe i am just so used to being alone that i do not know how to open my heart to anyone again.