i noticed i'm not lucky when it comes to getting gifts or surprises. so i work hard to give myself the things i want. i've learned to celebrate my own wins, even the small ones. i buy myself things that make me happy, i take myself out, and i remind myself that i deserve nice things too. it used to make me sad when no one thought to surprise me or make me feel special, but now i see it differently. maybe life just taught me how to depend on myself, how to create my own joy, and how to never wait for others to make me feel loved. i realized that giving to myself isn't selfish, it's a form of self-love. i might not get surprises from others, but i can always surprise myself with the things i've worked hard for. and that's enough.