maybe i am just someone who learns lessons instead of getting happy end ings. i watch other people find some one who stays, someone who chooses them every day, and i wonder what that feels like. sometimes it makes me question if there is something wrong with me, if maybe i am too much or not enough at the same time. but deep down i know my heart is not the problem. i just keep meeting people who don't know how to hold it gently. maybe one day someone will stay without being asked, and loving me will feel easy. not something they have to learn.