when i thought i was okay because i hadn't cried in days, but i realized i was just busy. i didn't have time to cry or understand my feelings. and when things finally slowed down, i felt everything i had been avoiding. the pain didn't disappear, it was only quiet. i wasn't healed, i was just distracted. being busy felt easier than being honest with myself. but i know that healing takes time. some days i feel fine, and some days i don't, and that's okay. i just need to be gentle with myself and give my heart the time it needs to rest and slowly heal.