i say sorry to everyone but to me i say sorry for everything, even when it's not my fault, i always see myself as someone who disappoints people. when something goes wrong, i blame myself right away without thinking twice, like it's always the only choice i have. i replay my mistakes in my head like a life sentence. i try so hard to please others that i end up shrinking myself just to keep peace, the peace that was everywhere but in my mind. i never stop to think about how unfair i'm being to myself, but even then nothing has changed, i still see myself only as a problem, that it erases all the trace of me being good. i carry guilt that doesn't even belong to me, that it ends up hurting me more than anyone else ever could. i always end up hurting me. it's never easy to unlearn something that feels like it's the only choice to have, to leave something uncomfortale yet comfortable. only now do i realize that i was never ugly or broken, i was just someone who forgot to see myself as beautiful.