Kindness should not cost you yourself I think a lot of kind people confuse self-sacrifice with love. They keep giving chances, giving energy, giving understanding, until there is barely anything left of themselves. Somewhere along the way, they start believing that being a good person means tolerating things that slowly destroy their peace. It doesn't. Being kind does not mean abandoning yourself to keep others comfortable. It does not mean staying silent when something hurts you. It does not mean continuously shrinking your needs so other people never have to feel challenged by them. Real kindness includes yourself too. There is nothing noble about constantly betraying your own feelings in the name of loyalty. At some point, you have to stop treating your heart like it exists only to be patient with everyone else. You are allowed to be compassionate without becoming emotionally available for your own mistreatment.